Crazy Cat Lady

A couple of months ago, a stray cat started wandering around our yard.  She was a scraggly thing.  I don't know much about cats, but I think her breed is called, "Ugly."  I don't know if she is some sort of calico but she looks more like a patch work quilt made by a blind person. I could tell she was pregnant but you could see her ribs.  She obviously once belonged to someone because she had good manners.  Even though I tried to discourage her from hanging out around our house, she was insistent that she belonged in our front yard near the driveway.  Even though she was obviously starving, I didn't run out to buy cat food hoping she would leave and go find someone else to beg from.  I refuse to be some sort of crazy cat lady.

Just having her in the yard made my eyes water.  I am allergic to cats.  I don't like them.  In fact, I kinda hate them.  I am more of a dog person but I even have my limits there.  I am basically not an animal lover.  I am more of a child person.  I love children.  That's why I have 5.  They are my pets. 

One afternoon as I was pulling into the driveway, coming back from picking up my children from school, I saw the scraggly Mama Cat leap into our broken down boat which has been sitting in our side yard collecting leaves and whatever the wind blows into it.  I hate that boat.  I was really mad at Adrian for buying that stupid thing.  I complain about it at least every other month pointing out what rednecks we are.  We may as well have a broken down car in the driveway.  Wait, we have that too.  We really are rednecks.

Any way, once I saw the Mama Cat jump into the boat, I knew that she was planning on having her babies in there.  I told Adrian but he didn't believe me. When he went to investigate, there was never any sign of the Mama Cat or any kittens.  This went on for a while.  But I watched the Mama Cat and realized she was going up inside the boat and I could hear little squeaks.  Holy crap.  There is a litter of kittens in our boat.

The Mama Cat stayed very busy.  She was hunting for her food.  She was good too.  I never knew we had little mice around our house but she sure did.  My kids watched her kill a bird or two.  For being so pitiful looking, she sure was an excellent hunter.  She looked so weak but in fact she was rather strong.  I started thinking about how as a mom, sometimes I feel the same way.  I may be pitiful sometimes, but I do whatever I have to do for my children.  I'd go hunt for food if I had too.  I may feel under qualified at times, but I always pull through.

Pretty soon, Mama Cat brought her babies into the sunshine.  She had six beautiful kittens.  Five black kitties and one white one.  They stayed inside the boat near the captain's chair.  She would hunt and nurse, hunt and nurse.  She looked like any new mother.  Ragged and worn out.  So, I broke down and went to buy cat food for the first time in my life.  I felt sorry for her.  I reasoned that it was only because she was nursing her babies.  I nursed all my babies too and I know how much that can wear you out.

Mama Cat was the most grateful cat.  She would smile at me when I'd bring her food and water.  She started hanging out at the boat with her kids for longer periods of time.  She would stretch out and soak up the sun.  She started gaining weight too.  She started to look a little less ugly.

I kept thinking, "Why in the world did this cat pick us?"  "Doesn't she know I hate cats?"  "Doesn't she know she is making my throat itch just being here?"  "I am so mad I have to find these kittens a home."

I called the animal shelter.  Please take these cats.  "There is no room."  There is no room at the Inn.  The shelter is full.  Sorry.  So I called the humane society.  They said they'd put them all to sleep.  For a fee.  Good Lord!  "Ma'am, I am sorry for saying this, but I think you should call your organization the Inhumane Society."

I started calling my friends.  Who wants a kitten?  Luckily, my friend Amy took two of them.  Their names are now Tarzan and Jane.  So we are down to just 4 kittens.

A few days ago, we saw Mama Cat jumping in and out of the boat.  She was teaching her children how to get out.  It has started getting very hot and they needed to go somewhere cooler. Three of the kittens stumbled out after their mother.  I don't know how she communicated with them, but they understood.  She took them to our porch.  And then she spent the rest of the day trying to coax the last kitty how to get out of the boat.  He wouldn't do it.  All day long and into the evening, Mama Cat went back and forth from the porch to the boat.  The one left behind, trembled on the edge of the boat for hours.  Finally, Sydney scooped up the kitten and brought him to his Mama.  He joined his siblings and began prancing around and playing.

We've all enjoyed watching the Mama Cat play with her kittens.  She is a good teacher.  She has taught them all to eat and drink out of the bowls we leave in the shade.  She lays on the porch and swishes her tail back and forth and lets them pounce on it.  The kittens love the sidewalk chalk my kids leave outside.  They stalk the chalk and then attack it.  The kittens jump off the porch and run to hide under it when we come outside.  They peak their cute little heads up and watch us.  All you can see are their little ears.

I don't know what will come of all of this.  I heard through the neighborhood grapevine that this cat belongs to someone who has let her have ten litters of kittens.  I am thinking she adopted us hoping we would love her.  She hasn't met Bailey our dog yet, but I am thinking they might become friends.  I guess we'll take her to the vet and get her taken care of and bring her back here to live the good life.  Hopefully we'll find homes for all her babies.  But if we don't, I may become the crazy cat lady after all.