"Don't cry because its over; smile because it happened."

Jolie was required to write an essay for the Georgia Laws of Life Essay Contest a few months ago. It is one of the largest essay contests of its kind in the world. This year, 44,880 students submitted an essay to the competition. Jolie was selected as one of the winners. Not only is it a great honor, she won some money!

The purpose of the essay is to challenge young adults to examine important character values such as love, loyalty, generousity, courage, compassion and perseverance. They had to pick a well known quote and write about how they use it in their lives.

The quote Jolie chose doesn't surprise me. My friend, Amanda, gave us this little quote in a frame after Daddy's funeral. It is on a shelf next to his picture and we read it every day. As we approach the anniversary of the day he left us and went to God, I am smiling because it happened. Jolie is too. I am so proud of her. She is a wonderful example to us all. Here's her winning essay:

“Don’t cry because it is over; smile because it happened.”
--Dr. Seuss

Losing my grandfather, “Boompa,” was the hardest thing I have ever been through. He had cancer. We thought he was winning his battle, but he suddenly took a turn for the worse at the end of April. I remember standing by his bedside. He looked so handsome and peaceful, even on his last day. I got to tell him goodbye. I got to tell him how much I loved him. I am so glad I had that chance. But it was incredibly sad.

I tried not to cry in front of anyone. Everyone was holding back tears. Eventually I couldn’t hold the tears back any longer. I went into a room by myself and finally let it all out. I wondered how I could ever feel happy again because I had never felt so low before. Boompa passed away later that night. I cried for days and days. I just missed him so much. I was sad that he won’t be at my plays. I was sad he won’t be able to teach me to drive a car. I was sad he will miss my graduation. I was sad that he will miss walking me down the aisle when I get married with my father, because I was so close to him, he was like my father too. And when I was little, before my mother married the man who adopted me, Boompa was the only father I had. How could I ever be happy knowing he is gone?

Eventually, my grief turned into gratitude. Trying not to think about Boompa only made me more devastated and only made me cry more, so instead I let myself think about him. Good memories began filling my heart. I remembered spending the night with my grandparents last year and watching High School Musical 2 with Boompa. It was cheesy, but the two of us enjoyed watching it together. Boompa was a pediatrician and he said he always had to keep up with what was cool for children so he would be able to talk about it at the office. He would pretend to see different characters in children’s ears while giving an exam, and so he needed to always be current with the times. Whenever I was little, he would see Barney, Big Bird and later, Zac Effron or Brad Pitt in my ears if I had an earache.

I began remembering all my summers spent with my grandparents at their pool or at the beach. Boompa loved having all his children and grandchildren around him. He was a family man. Boompa used to take me out in the ocean to find sand dollars. He would hold my hands and help me jump waves. He would tell me stories about the phases of the moon, the currents and the tides of the sea. Boompa loved to read, but at the poolside, he would always look up from his book and watch me and my brothers and sisters do tricks in our swimming or diving. He would cheer for us.

The memories of my grandfather now fill the space he left when he passed away. I still miss him more than anything, but I can now smile every time I think about him. It is okay to be sad. But it is also good to count your blessings too. And because of my Boompa, my life is filled with many, many blessings. I am so glad he was in my life, even though it was much too short.

--Jolie Cutchshaw age 14

My Little Square Peg, Sydney

After a 7 year battle with the school...Sydney finally wins! We claimed victory today in a three hour long meeting! Sydney has struggled to keep up in school for her whole life. Things do not come easy to her. She just learned to tie her shoes and is in the sixth grade! But she is smart, creative, articulate, funny, mathematically inclined and artistic. She has many gifts and talents, believe me!

Sydney gets things mixed up. She is not organized. She has terrible memory problems. She is like Dori in Finding Nemo. I have been begging the school to test her for learning disabilities. I have known for sure since she was little that she had ADHD and sensory integration dysfunction. She makes terrible grades. And she has been called names like space cadet, lazy, stupid, slow, etc... Both teachers and kids are guilty of making fun of her. She hates school. It is no picnic for her.

This year we hired an advocate and it was the best thing we ever did for Sydney. We've had long meetings, sometimes heated discussions and arguments from both sides. I have been emotional and cried. It has not been easy. I have felt tempted at times to give up. But I look at Sydney and see this bubbly, beautiful young woman and my love for her makes me get up and fight harder to help her. I would do anything I could for her.

Sydney and Nicholas really do have a lot of things in common. In fact, they speak the same language. Sydney has a very special bond with Nicholas and I think their minds work in similar ways. Dr. Rubin said it is very typical to see an autistic brother to have a sister with some form of learning difference. Girls usually fair better than boys if there is some type of glitch.

Today Sydney finally received an IEP. That stands for Individual Educational Plan. It means she will get help! It means no teacher can accuse her of not trying or say that she is just unmotivated. Anyone of you who knows Sydney knows that she is the opposite of unmotivated. She is a go getter in the real world. But when you fail constantly at school and you are terribly confused about what you should be doing at your desk, you eventually do give up.

It is sad, but at least things will turn around now. Where I felt despair, I feel hope. I am so happy! I cried and cried when I walked through the door this afternoon and hugged Sydney and yelled, "You won!" She smiled and said, "Does this mean no one can call me stupid any more?" And I said, "That is exactly what it means!" That piece of paper gives her power. It gives her power to ask for help. It gives her power to be understood. It gives her power in validating she has a real problem and it's not a CHOICE. Most teachers will look at Sydney and think because she looks normal, that she should learn like everyone else. But we don't all fit into the model for typical learning. Sometimes there really is a reason beyond a person's control of why they cannot do certain things without help. And I know a little bit of help goes a long way for Sydney because she has such a cooperative, generous, grateful spirit. So my little square peg finally got her IEP to help her find a way to fit into a round hole! Yipppee!