Pictures from Thanksgiving 2009

The Cutchshaws 2009

Just a couple of weeks before Christmas and all through my brain,
Are images of the past year that made me nearly go insane.

A bad car wreck, whip lash and a bump on my head,
Made my brain swell, my sense of smell go crazy and I had to stay in bed.

Jolie had a concussion, and Adrian’s neck got a slip disc,
The car was totaled as it landed sideways into a ditch.

Luckily, we are all alive and are finally now on the mend,
I sure hope lightning won’t strike twice as I couldn’t handle that again.

At the beginning of the year, Nicholas was diagnosed,
With PDD-NOS/ autism and our hearts sure felt broke.

With speech and occupational therapy and attending a special school,
He has made progress in leaps and bounds and we think that’s really cool.

Mollie started kindergarten and loves it so much,
She is a big girl reading and writing and she even rides the bus.

Mollie would like a fruit salad from Santa; her Christmas list is rather funny,
She’s been visited by the tooth fairy twice and had fun spending her own money.

Fischer is in third grade and all through school he’s just wishing,
That instead of doing math facts, he could be with his daddy fishing.

He played defense for the football team and was awarded best tackle of the season,
From the sidelines, you sure could hear all the Cutchshaws cheerin’ and screamin’!

For the first time, Sydney likes school and it’s working out wonderfully,
Thanks to the teachers at the middle school, especially to Mrs. Perry.

Sydney has caught the performing bug and is staring in some plays,
She is the sweetest girl with the biggest heart and is loving in every way.

Jolie’s a sophomore and is learning how to drive, imagine how old I feel,
But she has to sit in Mollie’s booster seat to see over the steering wheel.

Jolie is in her seventh season with the Main Stage Players Theatre,
She’s blazing the trail; to her brothers and sisters she’s a great leader.

Adrian’s about retired, business has been that slow,
But he’s become more of a stay at home mom, practically running the show.

I can’t believe he’s stayed with me for ten years, must have a thing for girls who are crazed,
And I have a thing for my old man who for his 50th birthday got some hearing aids.

A Clock, a Coffee Pot, and a Field of Lilies is on its second printing,
I hope Daddy’s in heaven looking down at us, very proudly grinning.

I am still writing my advice column and just got syndicated,
As you might imagine, “Lula Belle” is quite elated.

Our friends and family helped us this year on the days that were rather tough,
For all your love and support, words just aren’t enough.

The year was full of highs and lows, some days my head is not on straight,
So you should be amazed that you got this card and it wasn’t even late!

Merry Christmas! Love, Abigail, Adrian, Jolie, Sydney, Fischer, Mollie, and Nicholas

Autism part 6

When we first found out that Nicholas had autism, we were overwhelmed with all the "stuff" we needed to do. Plus, we felt really horrible trying to decide if it was some how our fault that he had a problem. We became very angry about the vaccine he had right after his first birthday. Nicholas had a terrible reaction to the MMR. His fever got up to 105 and it stayed that way even with Tylenol and Motrin, rotating every two hours for an entire week. I have feelings that the fever caused some brain damage. Or maybe it was all the toxins in that stupid vaccine. Or maybe it's just the way life happened. All I know, is that our precious baby was never the same afterwards. He wasn't happy any more. The cooing and smiling stopped. The little sounds he was learning to make stopped. He also stopped growing normally. Nicholas is almost 4 years old now but can still wear 18 month sizes, although many of his clothes are size 2T. He weighs 23 pounds. Nicholas is tiny. If you could see him naked, he looks like a starving child.

And then, I think about how quirky Sydney (his big sister) is and how she has matured into a totally wonderful 13 year old. Despite her learning disabilities, she is incredibly smart. So, maybe Nicholas' issues are genetic. Nicholas' developmental pediatrician said it is very common for a boy with autism to have a sister with learning differences. Plus, talk about sensory integration dysfunction! I could write a book about my experiences raising Sydney who was diagnosed with S.I.D. when she was 4. Plus she had a significant speech delay too. And whoa! Look at her now! It's hard to get that child to be quiet! So, maybe it's all related some how. But I still get mad when I think about my happy baby getting his vaccine when he was one. I will never know for sure why it happened because there is no way to go back to the past and NOT give him that shot.

So, here's where we are today: We have a unique child who is developmentally delayed in almost all areas. BUT we have a lot of hope and I will tell you why. Nicholas gets to go to Challenged Child and Friends! He gets to have speech therapy. He gets to have occupational therapy. He gets to go to preschool. He is making such progress! You wouldn't believe all the things he can do now. Nicholas can DO so many things. He can do a lot of things a typical 4 year old cannot do. He can spell, for one thing. He picked up American Sign Language like it was his first language. He remembers everything. He can start the computer and click on Internet explorer and google "Wall E" or " Tom and Jerry" all by himself. He knows how to spell his favorite things.

Plus, for whatever deficits he has, he makes up for it in other ways. I wouldn't trade any of him for anything. I love him just the way he is.

Mollie's List Part 3

OK, this is the last post, I promise. Read the first two before you read this one. Here is the conclusion, I think.

"Mommy, help me write this to Santa:

Dear Santa,
I would like a fruit salad for Christmas. Please make it in the shape of an elephant marching. Thank you very much. Merry Christmas. I want some play doh too.
Love, Mollie (age 5)

Mollie's Christmas List Part 2

Scroll down to Mollie's Christmas list and read the first part of the story before you read this post to get the full picture.

So, yesterday evening, I said, "Mollie, we really need to write Santa a letter so you can tell him what you want. And I know you really would like a real Native American or an almost dead baby, but I called Santa and told him about it and he said he couldn't give you either of those things. I also told him you would settle for a fluffy white dog but he said he was all out of dogs this year. So, I want you to think of something else, a toy or something, for him to give you. Here is a piece of paper so you can write it down and we can mail it in an envelope. OK?"

And so, Mollie sighed and said, "Well, if I can't have those things that I really, really want, I guess he could just bring me fruit salad."

"Huh?"

"Fruit salad! It's may favorite."

"What about a toy?"

"I already have toys! I don't have any fruit salad!" Mollie exclaimed as she crossed her arms and did a mighty big huffy breath at me.

"All right, all right. You can ask him for fruit salad but will you be sad if all your friends get new Barbies and games and all you get is a fruit salad?"

"I will just tell Santa he can bring me whatever he wants but if he doesn't bring me a fruit salad, I will be sad."

"OK."

"But I still want a Native American."

Happy Fall, Y'all

This is my favorite season. The leaves were at their peak last week. Now, they are all falling. I really feel so small but part of something greater when I stand outside as hundreds and hundred of leaves swirl all around me. And the sky...so blue and clear, when it's not raining, of course. We have had record rain fall this year and it is still coming! It's raining right now. The trees have been happy and have rewarded us with a brilliant display of color. Then, we get to crunch along pathways with the new carpet of foliage, hiding all the undergrowth which will make surprise appearances this spring. We don't fight the leaves. We let them be, the way our wonderful creator designed for their special purpose of giving the ground a blanket and providing nutrients as they eventually crumble and become one with the earth again.

Mollie's Christmas List

OK, so I asked Mollie what she wants for Christmas this year. I told her we need to make a list and mail it to Santa Claus this weekend. Her eyes lit up and she smiled really big and said, "I know exactly what I want for Christmas! I want a Native American!"

So I asked, "Do you mean like a Native American doll?" And she proceeded to tell me what she meant:

"No, Mommy. I want a real Native American. It's a person and some people call them Indians, but their real name is Native American. I want Santa to go to their land and bring me back a five year old Native American girl for me to play with. And Native American's swim in the river so me and my Native American can swim in the river together. We could play together every day and I would just love her so much!"

And I said, "Well, Mollie, Native Americans are just like you and me...they have families and you can't just take them away and keep them like pets."

And she said, "Well, her whole family could come live with us too and they could bring all their stuff and live in our back yard."

So I said, "Sweetie, people don't just live in other people's back yards. It is cold in the winter, so I am sure everyone would like to stay inside."

And she said, "Well, they could bring their Teepee and lots of blankets."

Then I said, "Mollie, Native American's are just like us...they live in houses and go to school and work. They don't live in teepees."

So, Mollie said, "OK, if I can't have a Native American for Christmas, I really would like a new baby."

And I said, "I hope you mean like a baby doll."

And of course she said, "No, I mean a real baby. I will ask Santa to find me a baby that is almost dead and he can wrap that baby up and bring her right to me and I will love her and take care of her and she can be my very own baby."

Then I said, "Oh, Mollie, that can't happen. I don't think Santa can find almost dead babies and if he could, he would find grown up Mommies and Daddies who could adopt them."

And then she said, "All right, then how can I have my own baby in my tummy?"

So I said, "Oh, Lord, child! Can't you ask for something more practical like a new bike, a Barbie or a new game?"

Mollie said, "I don't think so. I've been good and all I want is a Native American or an almost dead baby. I don't want anything else. So, I will write to Santa and tell him to just plop one or the other down the chimney. Don't worry, Mommy. I can handle it."

And I said, "I don't think that is going to happen."

So she said, "OK...how about a new puppy? I want a fluffy, white puppy and I will name her Puff Ball."

And this is how children con their parents into getting them pets. I mean, if getting a Native American or an almost dead baby is out of the question...surely a new dog is no big deal.

"Mollie, it is time for bed. You really wear me out sometimes."